The Betrothal - Stephanie Pavlantos

Sep 08, 2023


The Betrothal


"Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me." Rev. 3:20.

Revelation 3:20 represents the very beginning of the betrothal process during biblical times. A man who had found a woman to be his bride came to her family's house with his father and he knocked at her door.

The woman's family knew who it was and told their daughter to answer the door. If she wanted to pursue a betrothal with this man, she opened the door. If not, she left him and his father outside.

If she opened the door to him, the bridegroom and his father came in, and the two families shared dinner together as they worked out the details of the betrothal.

Once the two families were together, they shared the first cup of wine signifying the Cup of Sanctification—which represented the blood covenant/servanthood and was the first cup of Passover. These families would serve one another.

They began writing the Ketubah, or marriage contract. There was much discussion during this time as they hammered out how the bridegroom would take care of his bride, what possessions the bride would take into her marriage and the conditions of purity.

Four cups of wine would be drunk together before they consummated the marriage.

The second cup was the Cup of Bargaining or the Salt Covenant. This represented friendship between the two families while the third cup, the Cup of Redemption or Inheritance, drank by the bridegroom and his betrothed, represented their legal marriage.

At this point, if either was caught in adultery, there would have to be a divorce to get out of the covenant. If one died before the consummation of their marriage, the inheritance of the deceased went to the one still living.

They signed the Ketubah after the third cup and began the work. The primary responsibility of the bride was to get herself pure and be ready for her bridegroom's return for her, while the bridegroom's responsibility was to prepare a place for his bride.

The bridegroom would also have to pay the bride price (some say it was thirty pieces of silver...)

See how this relates to our betrothal with Yeshua?

Then he went to prepare a place for his bride. Jesus told us, 

"If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am, you may be also." John 14:3, ESV.

When the father approved of the place for his son's bride, he could go get her.

Would she be ready? Had she prepared herself for him? He would know once he got there.

The best man blew the shofar, alerting all to the bridegroom's return. The bridegroom and his groomsmen traveled to her town. If the bride was ready, she left her light burning—she had enough oil. Then she met him in the street with much rejoicing!

The bridegroom took her to his father's house for the party and ceremony. Once all the guests arrived dressed in white and holding palm branches, the groom and his bride drank the fourth cup, the Cup of Praise, and broke bread and dipped it in salt. (Communion).

The groom threw the cup onto the floor and stepped on it, making sure no one else could drink from their cup. He removed his bride's sandals and washed her feet. He gave her a new pair of sandals which represented a new inheritance covenant between them—all he had would be hers.

At the end of the ceremony, the groom wrapped his arms around his bride, covering them in his tallit, or prayer shawl, thus vowing to protect her and making them one.

Now the real party started.

Are you willing to open the door for your Bridegroom? He is waiting by the door—He loves you and wants you to be His bride.


Stephanie Pavlantos


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